Being a grown up can really suck sometimes. What happened to the good old days when my biggest worry was if my friends were coming over to play or what kind of lunch my mom packed me for school?!
These days (more like this past year) the toughest decision I have had to make was whether or not I would enter the workforce and become a working mama or if I would prefer to be a stay at home mom. Both have their benefits, and both have their draw backs, and both types of mamas are amazing and hard working who want nothing but the best for their families.
For me personally, this is an especially hard decision because I graduated with my Master’s degree and gave birth soon after. My program included an amazing internship which was a great opportunity for me, but that it is the only “work” experience I have to go along with my degree. And we all know that in this day and age, a degree and experience go hand in hand when trying to find a job.
For me personally, I’ve always known that I did not want to put my babies in day care unless it was absolutely necessary that I work in order to help bring income for the household. I know that is a blessing because there are many mamas out there who have no choice and must work to support their families (I have so much respect for them!). For me working would be more of a personal growth experience, a chance for me to go out in the real world, learn new skills, network and grow professionally.
In a perfect world, I would stay at home and raise my little ones until they are able to start school and then start working. The problem with that is by the time I have sent my babies off to school, so much time would have passed since earning my degree and we all know how hard it is to secure a job opportunity without much professional experience in the field. When the time comes, I may have to update my degree with some courses or training and I have come to accept that reality.
Whether you are a working or stay at home mom, I’ve noticed that there is a common theme between both and that is the underlying feeling of constant guilt. I’ve talked to moms who work a 9-5 job and their biggest complaint is not spending enough time with their little ones, especially with only three months for maternity leave. By the time Kiki was three months I had just established somewhat of a routine, and felt like I was beginning to know what she wants and her personality better. I couldn’t imagine having to leave her at such a young age at a daycare for someone else to take care of her.
I’ve also had conversations with stay at home moms who feel like they are not always giving their children 100% of their time and effort due to many reasons such as other responsibilities around the house or the feeling of loneliness. In my experience, I have found that the most important thing for any mom is to recognize your purpose and drive. What is it that makes you happy and content on a personal level so that you can be better for you family? This may require some sacrifices, and it might take some time for you and I to pin point, but I know it will be well worth it! Through this blog I’m hoping to both find the best version of myself as a mom, wife, daughter, sister, and friend, and possibly inspire YOU to be the best YOU there is!